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Post by jayden mattias gates on Jan 9, 2010 5:02:11 GMT -8
--- “GATES! WHAT IN THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? ” jay winced, brushing his sweaty fringe back from his face as he glanced across at the annoyed face of his coach. It wasn’t an unfamiliar sight, the guy was always yelling at someone for some reason or another, in fact, anyone would think his face was permanently that unnatural red color. The only part out of place was that the verbal abuse was directed towards him. As star player on the team – something he was at times hardly modest about – he rarely received any comment from the man further than post-game praise. Picking up a run he headed back to up the field, only to misjudge a pass and land the ball straight at the feet of the opposing center, who went on to score,“idiot..” he mumbled towards himself, visibly annoyed, for the first time he was actually relieved to hear the half time bell, and hanging his head he joined the rest of his team. Glancing around he noticed the coach who was motioning him over, mostly likely because it was easier to yell at him from close range. Almost hesistantly he jogged over, using the time to catch his breath, “yeah coach?” he asked breathlessly, “I don’t know whats bothering you kid, but whatever it is, can it wait until after the game? ” jay nodded, his gaze flickering automatically up towards the stands, “it’s a girl isn’t it?” he gave jay an almost pained look, and sighed, “women” he added knowingly, shaking his head.
--- Normally he had no trouble concentrating, normally he slipped naturally into that zone where nothing else mattered to him other than getting the little white and black ball into the goal. But for the first time he just couldn’t seem to focus, and as much as he hated to admit it, it was because of Delilah. Things between them were… odd to say the least, usually when he liked a girl he just told them, he’d never been the type that feared rejection, he was all for the ‘trying and failing is better than not trying at all’ mentality. That and he had always failed at being subtle. With Delilah it was different, with Delilah he was scared that she’d reject him, and not only that, he would lose his best friend in the process. They were legitimate fears too, she was far too comfortable with sarcasm for him to ever know whether or not to take the things she said seriously. But he could be just as bad, he supposed, what with all his suggestive remarks. He didn’t want to mess up their friendship, her was closer to her than anyone else, austyn included, and yet he wasn’t sure how much longer he could go on like this.
--- “focus.” he told himself, physically trying to shake himself out of it, and for the next half of the game pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind as best he could, by the full time they had managed a weak lead, nothing spectacular, but they had managed to win. Running both hands through his hair, he made straight for the change room, too distracted to notice anyone was talking to him until he received a playful clip on the ear, “duddddddde… what was up with you today?” his friend inquired with a teasing grin, jay shrugged, grabbing a towel and making for the showers. Ten minutes later he emerged, his hair damp and his clothes free of dirt or grass stains. Looking around he searched the crowd of spectators that had converged onto the team, locating her he smiled halfheartedly, unusually depressed considering they had just won. Hugging her briefly, he pulled back making a more concerted effort to look enthusiastic as his teammates brushed past, a few pausing clapping him across the back as they did so, “you coming?” Luke asked, grinning impishly towards Delilah but for once refraining from making any stupid comments. He shrugged, there was more importing things on his mind than going out to celebrate, namely his best friend, and what was bothering her.
--- Waiting until most of the people had started off toward their cars he glanced down at Delilah, “can we talk?” he asked, not even waiting for her to answer before practically pulling her out towards the now vacant field, “look dels, you can deny all you want, but I know something is up…” he began, glancing up at her briefly as they walked, “its about the other night isn’t it?” he pressed, halting now and gazing at her searchingly, however she was determined to give nothing away in her expression, which she had been doing for a few weeks now, she was hiding something, ever fiber in his body was certain of it, too bad every fiber wasn’t as certain about what she was hiding. “would you tell me? … I cant make it right unless I know what I did…” he added, frowning in frustration.
tag, delilah . word count, eight hundred and something . lyrics, michael jackson . status, done . notes, .. and affy finally got her lazy ass around to starting this, woo .
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Post by amalia vitale on Jan 9, 2010 12:30:08 GMT -8
 ________________________________________________________ - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - weird, weird, weird. yeah, she was pretty sure that was an apt description. what was worse is that she was the only who was feeling it. she was pretty sure jay was confused, she'd not been able to be as cool about what happened as she had hoped. he, of course, had no clue why her head was all a mess and she'd been more then a little awkward around him. he had no idea that he'd kissed her. or told her that he loved her. no, he was all perfectly in the dark because his stupid ass was completely sloshed. delilah took the frustration out on her defenseless pasta, stabbing at it so hard that it slide the ravioli off her plate and onto the cream colored table clothe her mother had just put on the day before. the clattering of forks ceased – all but her brothers – she stared at the renegade ravioli watching the red sauce spread out over the table cloth. quickly the fallen pasta was spirited away and her eyes flicked up in time to catch sam popping it into his mouth "mmm." he said digging back into his own plate, a smirk evident on his face. her parents and cassie still stared, until her father cleared his throat and attended to his plate again. they were the only ones that seemed interested – or aware – of lilah's uncharacteristic behavior. she'd been about the house in all states of moroseness since... the incident. she'd spent a great deal of time looking irritable, sometimes positively depressed. she'd only had a few good moments of being ecstatic: jayden loved her! however she realized quickly in these moments that he had been drunk and didn't remember – which promptly shot her back down to sullen and irritable. who knew she'd be so freaking good at being a crazy emotional teenage girl. at least she wasn't crying.
she had been trying to spend a good deal of her time not thinking about it, especially when she was around jay but it seemed pretty much impossible. home should have been a place she'd more effectively get away from the whole situation – ignoring that it had happened there – but it was littered with pictures of them. and it wasn't just in her room either, pictures her mom had put out featured them frequently. her room, though, was definitely the worst : it had a billion more pictures, stuff she'd borrowed, things that had silly private jokes attached to them. all of it was nuts and so completely unfair. this brought another hard stab to her pasta, this time the ravioli took the skewering like a man. this whole acting like nothing happened thing wad flawed too. it might have helped if she'd been able to avoid him more thoroughly, but her plan to avoid him as much as she could without it looking too out of the ordinary was pretty much impossible since any kind of avoidance was going to look suspicious. it didn't help that she could see that he knew something was up. granted it would have been harder not to realize something was bothering her, but he seemed pretty concerned.
the only way she had managed to avoid more pressing from jay was keeping a one to two person buffer between them. she was almost positive that left alone he'd be demanding to know what her deal was. she certainly wasn't going to be opening that can of worms and admitting to him what had happened. even though she had already made the concession that raine – the girl who see saw as a big sister and took most of her bigger problems to – was right and jay had meant what he said even though he was smashed, she was dead set on not making the concession of telling him of his admission and subsequent kiss. he was just going to have to remember all on his own. which had only brought up a whole new set of concerns; what happened if he wasn't going to say anything either? were they doomed to spend the rest of their lives pretending it hadn't happened? worse yet; what if he never remembered? she sighed and pushed her plate away, her appetite was now officially gone. disgusted she tossed her fork into the pasta and red sauce and stood, "i'm going to be late." she said running a quick hand through her hair and sighing, "you already are." was her brothers food garbled response as he reached for delilah's abandon plate, "trouble in paradise?" the question was designed to provoke her but she was going to keep her cool with him. for once. "shut up sam." was her brilliant response. her mother began to speak and lilah didn't really catch her words she was already pulled back into herself and her own thoughts, she nodded impatiently though, she had probably just agreed to do some shopping on her way back.
she was late on purpose, all apart of her brilliant avoidance plan that was flawed before she'd even tried to implement it. she didn't have the heart to actually miss the whole game that savored too much of disloyalty. she'd been to pretty much every game, excepting only away games and even then if some of the girlfriends of the other players were making the trek to go see it she always bummed a ride with them. shaking her head, she grabbed her sunglasses and heavy cardigan before she went outside through the garage to retrieve her bike. yeah, why hadn't this happened earlier? hurrying as fast as she could on her bike and with the protest of her leg – now blazing with mildly irritating pain – she chewed on her lip for a moment before she sucked it up and headed into the stands, smiling at one of the girlfriend's who held her seat, "i was worried you weren't coming..." she said only mildly concerned, flinching as something happened on the field, lilah switched her gaze from lynn, her eyes landing first on jay, looking frustrated. "do you know what's wrong?" lynn asked, finally stealing her anxious gaze from the field and jayden's yelling coach, "not a clue." she lied frowning, yeah, she had to get over this and quick. they managed to win, it hadn't not been the best game but they had pulled it out.
this new emotionally retarded delilah was also a chicken and for half a second she debated the pro's and con's of leaving now, lynn felt the hesitation and made her decision for her, "come on." the redhead said, pulling on her hand, they waited in relative silence, making only a few comments on the not so satisfying win, and when lynn's boyfriends unmistakable mop of curls appeared above the crowd the girl split, easily throwing herself into his arms. jayden stepped from behind the two and judging by his smile he was not feeling as relieved by the win as lynn had been. she tried to return his smile with dazzling effort, forcing one out that she hadn't used the past few weeks and gave him a hard hug. "congrats." she offered, stepping back from the hug, running a hand through her hair, unsure of what to say or do now, until her eyes flicked up to luke, he had the same look as he always did but at least he didn't pair it with his stupid commentary. she was hoping he was going to actually rescue her here, given the look on jay's face she was pretty sure this was the final straw and they were going to have to talk about this.
trying to force an unaffected smile, she nodded, "sure." and he certainly didn't waste any time in demanding his answer, he was right it was stupid of her to keep deny it, to him of all people. she looked up at him as he stopped, saying nothing to his words before she dropped her gaze. how are you going to get out of this one now delilah? "vain party; table for one." she joked her tone trying to be unaffected and teasing; sarcasm and displacement was always a solid path to take, "not everything is about you, jayden." though her feigned amusement faded quickly, it wasn't as satisfying as it normally would have been and she dropped her gaze, "you really don't remember?" she finally blurted, shaking her head, where was her filter when- oh man. great! she'd jinxed it, she could feel a barely there sting in her eyes, the kind that could only be a precursor to tears. now was the time she picked to turn into a ridiculous girl? 'no way' she thought fiercely, she had been hit by a car, shattered her femur and broken her wrist and hardly shed a tear, no fricken way was she going to cry about this.
this is tagged to jayden/the wonderful affy.<3 & it is complete , and i've got about one thousand four hundred and eighty two things to say to you. you can find the threads i'm rocking right here . oh , i've got to give a shout to liz for the amazing banner & me for the template . oh! i can't forget i have to say ; i am so freakin' in love with these two. :] and i really have to keep that down there, lol. kaye rambles her face off again.
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Post by jayden mattias gates on Jan 16, 2010 5:17:10 GMT -8
--- He had lost count of how many times he had tried to replay that night in his head, whatever he’d had to drink at the party must have been strong, because he could barely remember a thing, and it was frustrating him. The more he thought about it the hazier and more unreliable his recollections seemed to be. He figured this was his punishment, his penance for getting to be completely oblivious to whatever long-winded lecture that his best friend had given him once he had so graciously turned up at her house and put upon her too look after his totally inebriated self. There were only a handful of times that he had allowed to get himself that drunk, though allow was hardly the appropriate word, none of them had ended well, and it seemed like this one was no different. He was, quite simply, at a loss as to what he could have done, because up until now shes’d never acted this way around him, and he’d known her for a long long time.
--- What he did know was he had suddenly become much more aware of the fact that he was in love with his best friend, and that he had been for quite some time, he’d even admitted it to aleks the other day, or as close as he would ever come to admitting it at least. It was a subject he’d always avoided, mainly because it made him feel like such a wimp, that and he was not exactly big on talking about his emotions. Taking on a prop twice his height or back flipping off the roof of his house he barely felt a flicker of nervousness about, but standing in front of Delilah and telling her he loved her? The mere thought brought him out in a cold sweat.
--- He rolled his eyes at her response, though he really wasn’t all that surprised by it, getting a straight answer out of her was near on impossible, “your not being all weird around anyone else, Delilah” he responded, the teasing tone he was aiming for getting lost in his impatience, he had always been the more level headed one between them, but today he was having more trouble than usual in controlling his temper, today he wasn’t exactly in the mood for evasiveness. Pressing two fingers to his forehead, he closed his eyes briefly, breathing out slowly, at her words he glanced up, but she was looking down, avoiding his gaze. Although he had been almost certain that her recent weirdness had been due to that night, a part of him had been hoping that it had been something completely different, because this meant it was all on him, that he had done something to upset her, and he had to make it right, “I think that’s kind of obvious isn’t it?” he asked, mouth tipping slightly with an almost smirk, realizing belatedly that being a smartass was not going to help him get the information he was looking for, he’d known he long enough to know that pissing her off would only make her close up more, “why else would I be asking?” he asked, more tentatively, gazing at her for a long moment.
--- Sighing he turned his attention away, picking up a soccer ball that was by his feet and bouncing it on his knee before catching it again, and glancing towards her, “Delilah?” he said, softly, surprised by the look on her face, it wasn’t one he’d ever expected to see, despite being a girl he’d seen more tears from the tough guys on his soccer team then he had Delilah. It was one of the things that he loved about her, her resilience, the fact that she didn’t burst into tears over nothing, of course right now it was actually quite frustrating. In his experience, the crying usually led to the confession part, which was what he was after, the confessing part. He hesitated for only a second before dropping the ball and stepping forward and wrapping his arms protectively around her, “dels your killing me here..” he said in a low voice, his concern conflicting with his anger and frustration at not being able to figure out what was going on with her, taking her face in both hands he made her look up at him, which made it very hard not to be aware of how close her lips were, and how much he would like to just lean in and kiss them, but he forced that thought quickly away, “just tell me whats going on please? ” he pleaded, gazing down at her intently.
tag, delilah . word count, ehhh . lyrics, michael jackson . status, done . notes, .. i cant ramble for the life of me. .
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Post by amalia vitale on Jan 16, 2010 12:16:14 GMT -8
________________________________________________________ - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - even though it has been his stupid drunk self that had tipped over the first domino in this awkward and confusing chain of events, she was pretty sure at this point it was mostly her fault they were at this particular stand off. she couldn't just act normal or blow it off as something he merely said because he was drunk and just not thinking. oh no, this was when she had to turn into a girl and get all caught up with her feelings, and now she was positive her coach so no dating not because they were worried about the girls getting pregnant and being out of commission. no it was the much more dangerous distraction that came with being preoccupied in trying to figure out your emotions. generally she was pretty good at compartmentalizing it, when her emotions did act up she could separate herself from them for awhile and worry about it later, but these emotions were not going to be silenced, and as much as she hated to admit she had to wonder if it was just an estrogen thing or a being in love kind of thing. either way it sucked pretty hard and there wasn't anybody she could talk to, aleks would be no help at all, raine was less of a help then she expected and sometimes she could turn to jay talking in very loose abstract terms and he'd offer more often then not a pretty decent solution, but she couldn't talk to him about him. it was pretty obvious that she wasn't going to be able to ignore it and this whole avoidance thing was fruitless, but the less logical side of her was not ready to give up on moving past this. even if she could ignore this, the way she had been feeling since he'd said it and she'd finally let herself admit it out loud too she was almost sure it would happen again in another form and hopefully with no alcohol involved. his voice drew her back from her thoughts and she looked back up at him, her feigned amusement dimming again, the use of her full name didn't escape her, they were perpetually coming up with more and more ridiculous nicknames to irritate the other, full names didn't mean normal, fun conversations. she could see traces of irritation hardening his face and she began to feel a little bad, this wasn't his fault they were doing this and it's not like he had done something bad without realizing it as was the talent of all guys, he really honestly had clue what happened.
already irritated enough with herself, his smartass comments did little to help improve her disposition, she crossed her arms looking away from him again she glared at a spot in the grass, "your drunk memory, or lack thereof i should say, is really inconvenient." irritation steeped into her tone and she didn't really care at this point, maybe if she got him irritated enough he'd stop talking to her for a little while and it's be easier for her to sort this stupid thing out. however she was pretty sure going any length of time not talking to him would be more uncomfortable then normal and she shook her head, "i'm sorry...." she mumbled, dropping her gaze to the grass again, she was pretty sure that this wasn't they way it worked, once the best friends admitted they loved each other the were supposed to live happily ever after, this was not how it went in movies, it was false advertising really. "that's a fair point." she admitted, looking back up at him and meeting his gaze, she could see the confusion, irritation and even a bit of concern in his eyes and it made her feel a little worse. stop being a chicken and just tell him. which was easier said then done, who knew this would be the kind of thing that made the fearless and at times reckless teenager shake her head at, what were words compared to throwing herself in the air and relying on four centimeters of fiberglass to keep her from hurtling to the ground, turning handstands 7 feet in the air was easier then just telling him she loved him.
she was more thankful then anything when her silence brought him enough irritation to step back for a moment, there was no way she was going to cry, it just wasn't her. especially over something like this, she was not going to get all emotionally retarded over a boy, she was not going to turn into the very girls she made fun even if it was only for a minute or two. she looked up realizing the dull thud of the ball hitting his knee had stopped and she regretted it instantly, there were just some things she couldn't hide very well, especially when it was something she didn't have practice in keeping buried. he'd held her like this a million times but now all it was to her was too close to the events that had caused all of this, he'd pulled her into his arms almost exactly like this when she'd been yelling at him about getting drunk, it wasn't even five minutes later he'd said that he loved her and he had kissed her all too briefly. most of her wanted to pull out of his arms at the memory, this defeated, guilty part of her turned her face into his chest and squeezed her eyes shut tight, forcing back the tears and helping her focus on not just blurting out that she loved him, right then and there, it was just something she couldn't deny anymore. she held on lightly to his wrists when he took her face into his hands, keeping her gaze down until he spoke again and she was almost started by how close they were, she could his breath against her face and his lips were temptingly close. she pulled her eyes to his to ignore the nagging "kiss him, idiot" feeling, but it didn't help, in fact it really only made it worse, she tilted her face up to his just barely before she pulled away from him entirely, using her hands that had rested on his wrists to pull his hands away from her face and she stepped back, "i've got to go..." the brunette said hurriedly turning away from him, irritation broke through her again, what the hell? what are you doing? the tiny raine-like voice screamed in her head.
she'd gotten maybe three steps away from him, before her irritation with herself for being a chicken and acting like a girl got to her and she wheeled back around, deciding that this was his fault and just letting it all spill out on to him, "can i just say that next time you decided to declare your love for someone you do it when your sober so you can actually remember!" her voice higher then her agonized whisper when trying to get away from him, she bit her lip looking away from him and tried to catch her breath before she turned away again, god she shouldn't have said that. the fact her knee was blazing from her bike ride here was the only thing that had stopped her from breaking into a run to get back to her back. pulling a hand roughly through her hair, she turned back around and stepped back towards him, "and another thing, that was a pathetic kiss!" a blush accompanied this outburst, "that's how you kiss the ugly girl you land on in spin the bottle not the girl you just said you loved." totally ignoring that the brief kiss had done more to her then all of her previous more intense kisses combined. though there was a lot of internal rejoicing she'd pulled out the fearless delilah, not this silly nervous girly one, but it was slowly starting to come back and she began to second guess herself; what did she just do? why had she done that?
this is tagged to jayden/the wonderful affy.<3 & it is complete , and i've got about one thousand three hundred and fifty three things to say to you. you can find the threads i'm rocking right here . oh , i've got to give a shout to liz for the amazing banner & me for the template . oh! i can't forget i have to say ; it's mostly just an annoying habit lol. i was a little inspired by the scene in the notebook in the rain except no kiss haha.
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Post by jayden mattias gates on Jan 27, 2010 2:19:00 GMT -8
--- His expression softened, if only slightly, “how do you think I feel? Your angry at me, and I cant even remember why..” he responded, the irritation in his words less impressive than Delilah’s had been, but still present. In years of friendship this was one of the first times that he had been legitimately annoyed at her, ninety nine percent of the time it was always the other way around, “its not like I’m just pretending not to remember to be a smartass” he began, though given his track record, it was hardly out of the question, “ I really don’t remember..” he added, his voice dropping lower and more earnest now. He hated to fight with her like this, and avoided it. To her admission he watched her steadily, hoping for some sort of elaboration, but there was none, and his temper flared again. Whatever anger he felt however, melted away at the sight of his best friend close to tears, he could see she was doing her best at hiding it, but that look was simply unmissable, and certainly out of place on her beautiful face. He held her tightly in his arms, trying to comfort her as best he could, while still trying to figure out what it was he was comforting her for.
--- Frowning as she pulled his hands away, he moved to stop her, but hesitated, instead watching mutely as she started to walk away. So much for clearing things up, he was more confused about the whole situation than he had been before, this was not the way things worked between them. Sure, there had been numerous things that his fiery best friend had got annoyed enough at him to storm off, she had a short temper, it was nothing new, but it was always deserved, and it was always prefaced by some kind of bodily harm being inflicted upon him. This felt more like she was retreating, “deliliah?” he called, perplexed, hopeful and yet still surprised when she suddenly spun around and faced him again. He was more surprised however at the level of anger that flashed in her eyes, of course, in about two seconds flat this was increased two fold, he couldn’t believe his eyes, blinking her stared at her, “what?” he managed to choke out, totally unprepared. In a million years he never thought that it would be that, then again, they didn’t call it liquid courage for nothing. No wonder she was upset, though now he had figure out whether she was angry about him kissing her, or angry about him kissing her and not remembering that he did. The egotistical part of him, of course, was given to the second of these, but then there was a niggling in the back of his mind, the same niggling that had kept him from saying anything all along, the niggling that was certain that the way he felt about her wasn’t mutual. Normally he wouldn’t second guess himself, he was impulsive, and relied on his gut in most instances, even when his head knew better.
--- The taunt was enough to break him out of the trance, enough to key up that competitive streak he had always had. So much so that there wasn’t a moments hesitation when he pulled her towards him, in a manner that offered her little chance for resistance, and silenced her with his lips. He kissed her in a way he’d never kissed another girl, and he had kissed other girls. All beautiful in their own right, but he’d never managed to feel for them the way he felt for Delilah so he always broke things off before it got serious. He was an ass at times, but not enough of one to give a girl false hope. He was too breathless to speak when he finally let the kiss break, but it didn’t stop the faint smirk from appearing on his face. For so long he had wanted to just do that, and technically he already had, but the first one hardly counted because he didn’t remember it, “better?” he asked then, gazing down at her.
tag, delilah . word count, ehhh . lyrics, michael jackson . status, done . notes, .. i'd prefer that.. everything i write fails, sorry.
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Post by amalia vitale on Jan 28, 2010 15:21:04 GMT -8
________________________________________________________ - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - this is definitely not how she saw her day going, of course she only had very loose plans, avoid jay even though she was going to go to his game because it would have been a just too wrong to not go, then hurry off to aleks' house and pretend there was nothing wrong, probably spend most of her time with vasya because you couldn't help but be in good mood playing with the toddler, you had no choice but to smile. yelling at him was not part of that agenda, things finally coming to a head was not what she wanted, especially when he still had no idea what had happened, as much as she had insisted to rain she was not telling him what happened she was pretty sure she was about to break. "i'm not angry, per se... at least not about what you did." she was more angry at what he wasn't doing; remembering. then she was also a little angry at herself, thinking herself quite ridiculous for getting wrapped up in the boy drama she always hated. delilah looked up as he spoke, god, did he have to make her feel so guilty? she definitely wouldn't have put it past him, he do something pain in the ass like that but she was only worrying about him feigning memory loss because he regretted what he said and done, that he really didn't mean it. why else could he remember pretty much everything else but that? it was a possibility she had run by raine in a later conversation that had earned her a slap upside the head, though it was something had stuck with her. now she was just wondering if he really did remember but was faking because he wished he hadn't , why had he bothered to confront her?
as if she wasn't already having regrets of letting her temper with herself get away with her and hauling off without thinking like that, the way he stuttered over his words made it worse. of course. he was going to be the exception, he hadn't meant it, he couldn't believe he had told her something like that. she crossed her arms over her stomach, "it's okay..." she said, "i didn't think you meant it anyways," she lied, which since he knew her so well, he'd have picked up on immediately, but saying it might have made him feel better if she was playing on the right reason for his shock- and she was really, really hoping she was wrong. as hard as she'd tried to keep her primary feelings on the matter set to "cynical", there was a trickling of hope that had burst forth when she'd finally admitted to being in love with him that night, she never wanted to have to deny it again, but she had to, because he'd forgotten, because - and this thought made her feel horrible - because he hadn't meant it. there were so many other girls that were in love with him and shamelessly threw themselves at him, why on earth would he have wasted his time on her. when she admittedly had done very little to encourage him, but there were a few comments here and there when she'd forgotten herself and sort of flirted with him. admittedly these had increased over the years, but she tried to avoid it as much as she could, especially when you had such a perceptive best friend that liked to double as cupid.
at this point, enough second guessing had made her embarrassed for her outburst, which further reminded why she had been so adamant about refusing to tell him. telling him had not brought any great relief, if anything it made her all the more anxious. feeling like an idiot, she started to turn again to leave, but gave a little cry of surprise when he pulled her into him, she was ready to yell at him again until he closed the space between them quickly. it took a split second before she returned his kiss eagerly, this was the kind of kiss she'd wanted the other night, she gripped the front of his shirt trying to pull him closer to her, even though it was kind of impossible. this was also one of the outcomes she didn't see, but had totally hoped for. if she had thought the first kiss had played with her heart and made the butterflies in her stomach go insane, it was nothing compared to this. she was pretty sure that was about as perfect as anything ever got, it still lingered even as he finally pulled away. lilah was glad he held on to her, without him she was pretty sure her legs would have given out and she had to admit all the silly things she used to hear her friends talk about suddenly made more sense, she could complain about turning all girly later, trying to return her breath to normal was the main priority now, she felt a little dizzy. "it was okay...." she finally managed, her breathing still less then even, her tone teasing and her a playful smirk of her spreading across her lips. it was her subtle way of asking him to kiss her again, but remembering how good he was with subtle , she leaned forward and kissed him again.
by all rights this should have scared the crap out of her, she'd never had to much of a beef with her coach's strict "no dating" rule, one boys were too complicated most of the time and most guys wouldn't have been able to handle her heavy training schedule, she rarely had time for herself and her family, forgot trying to carve out time for a boyfriend. honestly though, for all her confidence, she always had been a little afraid of getting into a relationship. she may not have been one of those people with hardcore trust issues, but you had to give a lot of yourself in a relationship, you were terrifyingly vulnerable. tackling a relationship with jayden presented more issues; he was her best friend. one of the few people who truly got her, who she could go to with anything, who had seen her in at her worse. this was the guy she ran around in sweats and no make-up without even thinking about it, should things end badly... she didn't want to lose him. ever. still, those weren't her worries as she kissed him, for right now she was more preoccupied in enjoying this moment before they would have to go over the serious stuff, this was the moment that she thought more about then she'd ever, ever let on - even now that she could no longer deny she felt way more then friendship for him. she pulled back from him, her smile wide, it was a little harder to catch her breath this time since she hadn't really been properly recovered from the first one, "i guess that wasn't so bad." she teased, smirking and laughing a little, moving her hands from his chest to resting her arms on his shoulders. she bit her lip for a moment, almost a little unsure, "i love you." she said, catching his gaze and smiling, she may not have been sure what all this meant for them yet, but she'd wanted to say it to him a million times since that night.
this is tagged to jayden/the wonderful affy.<3 & it is INcomplete , and i've got about one thousand two hundred and forty one things to say to you. you can find the threads i'm rocking right here . oh , i've got to give a shout to liz for the amazing banner & me for the template . oh! i can't forget i have to say ; your post did not fail.
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